Petered-out-Pals

QUESTION:
Dear P.S.
I have a friend with whom I used to be close, but we don't spend much time together anymore and neither one of us really makes the effort to stay in touch. We live in the same city, but we just don't spend any time together. When I look at her life and at mine, I see more differences than I see similarities. We just don't have much in common anymore. When we do hang out, or have spent time together, I don't enjoy myself and I find it more of a chore than a good time. And then I feel guilty for feeling that way. Part of me wants to "break up" with her as a friend, but she hasn't done anything to me that merits such action. But I just don't see how we can be friends anymore. Do I just let the friendship die out naturally?

ANSWER:
Dear Friend,

If you were once good friends, can you remember the reasons why? Other than common interests sometimes friends are important just because they are supportive and are great company. Look at Joey and Chandler. They had opposite views on relationships; eternal bachelor and happily married man. As for careers, Joey was a working actor and Chandler was a...he worked at the...well, he, ummmm....what DID Chandler do? Anyway, when they did start to "break-up" it was mostly because Joey's career success had him going in a different path... and moving into a new apartment. But they finally realized they had a strong bond and lots of memories that kept them together. And they just really LIKED each other. If you find that you can't come up with things you can enjoy with her/him or just plain don't like this "friend" as a person then it IS time to move on. And no worries about ending it. Friends are people you are supposed to enjoy. Otherwise they would have called the show "People-I-sort-of-like-but-not-really"